Said my final goodbyes to Megan and AJ on Thursday night. I’m already missing them as I’m typing this at 2.40am in Sao Paulo. I would be missing AJ’s birthday again; bloody second time in a row. I left for Melbourne at 6am on Friday morning and took a plane to Sydney. I stayed in what would be more considered a nunnery’s dorm room than a hotel, but it was cheap and close to the airport. Called the kids before taking off - AJ was mentioning all the cake he was eager to consume. Then he told me he loved me and missed me. That killed.

But not as much as the flight to Santiago. I sat next to an enormous old man who’s toenails were longer than my fingers and constantly ate chips and talked to me so loudly that all the flight attendants thought we were together. That was bad because their rudeness to the man fell out on to me. Couldn’t even get a glass of water if I wanted one. All the staff were avoiding us.

I had three long hours in the lounge at Santiago, that would have been murder if it weren’t for the breathtaking views outside the window. These views got even better after take off. I had never thought I would ever see mountains like this, even through a small window. I filled out a form on the plane to Sao Paulo that gave permission for survivors to eat me should there be a crash in the Andes. For an hour or so it felt like that may actually occur. Pelting rain and high turbulence meant that it was touch-and-go for a long time, and our arrival was delayed somewhat. The pilots got huge cheers and a standing ovation from all of us once we touched down, which only aggravated the crew even more (yeah yeah we know don’t leave your seats until the light has switched off, yeah, yeah … can’t we celebrate for a second that we’re still alive?).

Now, Sao Paulo is only as large as the entire population of Australia, so I knew that the car trip was going to take a little while. The driver who met me (the very first time ever I was greeted at an airport by a man with a sign!) couldn’t speak any English, and my Portuguese was worse. Whenever he talked to me, I said I didn’t know, so he repeated it louder. Love it when we do that, so much fun. But I was more interested in the road, especially knowing that the truck heading towards us thinks it’s on the right side of the road, and we think we’re on the right side of the road, and this guy doesn’t seem to remember if we’re meant to drive along the white lines or over them.

We drove for about forty minutes, and along about fifteen different motorways. Would be amazing if it was during the day so I could get a look, or wasn’t still getting over my last brush of death. So when I arrived at the hotel at 11pm I didn’t want to stay down. I met Kofi in the room we’re sharing, and then called reception and asked for the room numbers for everyone I knew. I ended up having caipirihnas and catching up on the years with Patricia and Milja. These will be excellent times, now I’m here.